Stop Snoring Guarantee

Archive for the ‘Snore No More Pillow’ Category

1….What women want in a man at age 22:

1. Handsome
2. Charming
3. Financially successful
4. A caring listener
5. Witty
6. In good shape
7. Dresses with style
8. Appreciates finer things
9. Full of thoughtful surprises
10. An imaginative, romantic lover

What women want in a man at age 32:

1. Nice looking (preferably with hair)
2. Opens car doors, holds chairs
3. Has enough money for a nice dinner
4. Listens more than talks
5. Laughs at my jokes
6. Carries bags of groceries with ease
7. Owns at least one tie
8. Appreciates a good home-cooked meal
9. Remembers birthdays and anniversaries
10. Seeks romance at least once a week

What women want in a man at age 42:

1. Not too ugly (bald head is fine)
2. Doesn’t drive off until I’m in the car
3. Works steady – splurges on dinner out occasionally
4. Nods head when I’m talking
5. Usually remembers punch lines of jokes
6. Is in good enough shape to rearrange the furniture
7. Wears a shirt that covers his stomach
8. Knows not to buy champagne with screw-top lids
9. Remembers to put the toilet seat down
10. Shaves most weekends

What women want in a man at age 52:

1. Keeps hair in nose and ears trimmed
2. Doesn’t belch or scratch in public
3. Doesn’t borrow money too often
4. Doesn’t nod off to sleep when I’m venting
5. Doesn’t re-tell the same joke too many times
6. Is in good enough shape to get off couch on weekends
7. Usually wears matching socks and fresh underwear
8. Appreciates a good TV dinner
9. Remembers your name on occasion
10. Shaves some weekends

What women want in a man at age 62:

1. Doesn’t scare small children
2. Remembers where bathroom is
3. Doesn’t require much money for upkeep
4. Only snores lightly when asleep
5. Remembers why he’s laughing
6. Is in good enough shape to stand up by himself
7. Usually wears some clothes
8. Likes soft foods
9. Remembers where he left his teeth
10. Remembers that it’s the weekend

What women want in a man at age 72:

1. Breathing
2. Doesn’t miss the toilet

2…..A married man thought he would give his wife a birthday surprise by buying her a bra.

He entered a ladies shop rather intimidated, but the girls took charge to help him.

"What color?" they asked. He settled for white.

"How much does it cost?" he asked.

"Twenty dollars." "Very good," he thought. All that remained was the size, but he hadn’t the faintest idea.

"Now sir, are they the size a pair of melons? Coconuts? Grape fruits? Oranges?"

"No," he said, "nothing like that."

"Come on, sir, think. There must be something your wife’s bust resembles."

He thought long and hard and then looked up and said, "Have you ever seen a Spaniel’s ears?"

3…..This one is to make amends to the ladies….
Why do only 10 percent of men make it to heaven?
Because if they all went, it would be called hell.

How are husbands like lawn mowers?
They’re hard to get started, they emit noxious fumes, and half the time they don’t work.

How can you tell when a man is well hung?
When you can just barely slip your finger in between his neck and the noose.

How do you get a man to stop biting his nails?
Make him wear shoes.

How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb?
One. He just holds it up there and waits for the world to revolve around him.

How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Three. One to screw in the bulb and two to listen to him brag about the screwing part.

How many men does it take to tile a bathroom?
Two – if you slice them very thinly.

Why can’t men get mad cow disease?
Because they are pigs.

What do you call a handcuffed man?
Trustworthy.

What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for breath and calling your name?
You didn’t hold the pillow down long enough.

How does a man show he’s planning for the future?
He buys an extra case of beer.

What do you call the useless piece of skin on a penis?
The man.

Why do men have a hole in their penis?
So their brains can get some oxygen now and then.

Why do men name their penises?
Because they don’t like the idea of having a stranger make 90 percent of their decisions.

Why does it take 100 million sperm to fertilize an egg?
Because not one will stop and ask for directions.

What makes a man think about a dinner by candlelight?
A power failure.

What should you give a man who has everything?
A woman to show him how to work it.

What has eight arms and an IQ of 60?
Four guys watching a football game.

What’s the best way to force a man to do sit?ups?
Put the remote control between his toes.

What’s a man’s idea of honesty in a relationship?
Telling you his real name.

What’s the difference between Big Foot and intelligent man?
Big Foot has been spotted several times.

Why did God create man before woman?
He didn’t want any advice.

Why did God create man before woman?
Because you need a rough draft before crea

As usual, very funny.

but,,,
If they can put one man on the moon, why can’t they put them all there?

Ok, I am a night owl, and my fiance is a morning person. Keep this in mind while reading this.
His beef with me is that he says that I keep him up all night.
He gets up at least 7 times a night to use the bathroom/eat snacks/have a cigarette. He is up at least 7 times, sometimes many more. He has done this for years and years. His kids even joke about it.
While he is sleeping, sometimes I have the tv on. While I am watching tv, he snores away, but then complains that he wasn’t sleeping, saying that he was just laying there. ( can you snore like that when you are not sleeping?)
Ok, so I don’t put the tv on. I try reading instead. I have a tiny light that he bought for me so I can read in bed. He complains that it is keeping him up at all hours….
The next night I am on my laptop. The screen is turned away from him & I am across the room. There are no lights on & the sound is off. I am literally sitting in the pitch black dark, with only the light from my screen. I am barely even typing, because the site I am on only requires that I scroll. He gets up his usual 7 times & tells me that I am keeping him up!
Last night I didn’t even go into the bedroom. I stayed in the kitchen with my laptop & my mp3 player to amuse myself. I make no noise at all. Our bedroom is at least 30 feet from the kitchen. He makes his nightly trips to the refrigerator, and the bathroom. He loudly complains that I am keeping him awake, because I am not in the bedroom!
Meanwhile, unless I fall asleep first, I have trouble getting to sleep because he snores so loudly, and jumps around in his sleep. I know he needs to lose weight, the DR said that would lessen his snoring. I feel badly pointing out that the milk & cake & cookies during the night are not helping him.So I keep my mouth shut about the treats. I don’t want to bug him. He knows he needs to quit eating all that garbage. He gets very crabby when he wakes up in the middle of the night. He has been very crabby during the day, due to the fact that I keep HIM awake all night.
We have been living together for almost 5 years now, and if anything it has gotten worse. He has gained about 40 lbs since we started dating.( He blames that on my cooking.)
Bottom line is, am I losing my mind? Is he serious about my keeping him awake all the time? I don’t want to suggest to him that we have separate bedrooms. I do enjoy sleeping next to him, after all, he is my pirate. I love being held during the night too. If I am not laying down next to him, he is holding pillows, where my body would normally be ?
Am I to blame for his sleeplessness? I only require about ½ the amount of sleep that he does. If I am being quiet while he sleeps, why does he always need to complain about it? I have nick-named our bedroom the “Bat Cave”. What should I do?
Wow, sorry this is so long.. I just need to add that when he gets up in the middle of the night to eat, he falls asleep sitting up at his desk! He gets the nods & then it jolts him awake! I have seen him sit & sleep for hours at a time. Oh, and there are no drugs/drinking in our home, so that’s not it…..

His body seems restless for many reasons and he is taking it out on you with silly excuses because he cannot admit what is really going on. For him to wake up in the middle of the night i could assume he is stressed at work? or some form of stress from somewhere. Him eating in the middle of the night could mean he’s trying to distract himself from whats bothering his mind because people usually eat the wrong food for comfort. Having sugar in his body and his gluclose level soaring will make it much more harder for him to sleep throughout the night. Its not fair that he is taking this out on you constantly, you really need to be confident in yourself to talk openly with him about it. If he loves you he should be able to understand how you feel attacked and you’re hurting for being blamed on with these sorts of things. You should be able to freely browse the internet at night or watch tv if it doesnt interfer with his needs. You have made effort by being in the kitchen to not interfere with his sleeping needs so blaming you and not identifying your effort is definitely unfair. The sooner you address this problem with him the sooner both of you can find a resolution that makes you both satisfied.

What the f*ck am I gonna do? My girlfriend has always snored but it’s been slight and not every night or every position she lays. In the past few weeks she has gotten louder, all night, every night and in every position I roll her in. What can I do without smothering her with a pillow or packing my bags? What could have caused this sudden change that she does it all the time now?

I get no bloody sleep anymore and she seems to think I’m exaggerating. I’m not! She falls to sleep instantly and I am left struggling to get to sleep. When I do, I’m woken up by her throughout the night and it starts again – I struggle to nod off.

Is there anything available from shops? Not the strips that go across your nose because I know for a fact she will not wear one of those……

(I ask in this section because I will get more answers than in the health section)
Carol the Undead cannot read. I have said what ever side she lays on, she will snore…….

I know exactly how you feel
My girlfriend used to snore EVERY night and I’d wake up tired and in a bad mood
For the last few months she has been wearing a stop snore ring and it has stopped her snoring completely
It works on acupressure and it’s as simple as wearing a ring on the little finger
If you go to their website there are hundreds of testimonials
Just make sure when you give her the ring she doesn’t think it a proposal!

Here it is:
The worn rock of the tombstone is damaged by the unforgiving rain. His eye rests on it sadly. The rough stone under his trembling fingertips remind him of that day. The day when his father had, unbeknownst to him, slipped from our world of the living into another. The sky was clear and blue; the poppies bloomed and bowed their heads to the song of the wind.
The day his father died had been a sunny one; his mother had been fairly happy, but he himself was ignorant as to why. His father had been lying on the couch as he always was, but he did not snore, nor did he stir in his rest. His father’s death was indeed sudden, but it wasn’t very damaging to the boy himself. Why, just the next day he was back to playing out in the fields with his peers.
After all, the world itself hadn’t changed. The poppies still bloomed, the sun still shined, the world still spun as it always has and always will. So if the world itself hadn’t changed, why should he? It was of no importance to him whether his father should live or die, at least, as long as the place he inhabited continued to do its job. No use crying over spilled milk, as was said to him many a time.
But now, there is pain in his heart where it had not been just a few years ago. And it is broken. He is broken. Quietly, he rises. His dark eye stares at the sun’s provocative glow. He scowls to himself, then turns and walks toward the orphanage. His home.
When he returns to the orphanage, he maintains his everyday routine. He gets his daily chores done. He plays with the children, smiles at them, feeds them, scowls at them, and more than anything, he resents them. He spites them, these children with everything given to them but their very own pair of parents. He cannot help it, in their blind and pathetic ignorance they believe all that is told them, and he feels as though it is their own fault because of this.
After he finishes his work, he lies down on his cot, feeling as restless as he always does, and without fail. His eye lies on the obnoxious grinning moon hanging tiredly in the black night sky. This night, he actually does something out of the ordinary, at least, in his own respect. He pulls himself out of his uncomfortable bed and starts down the dim corridor.
There is complete darkness, except for a shadowy figure bathed in the moonlight. He squints and the figure stands hurriedly. He holds his hand out to the quivering figure; but the figure ignores this kind and sympathetic gesture, not wanting to take part in charity in any way, shape, or form.
Tears roll down the figure’s cheeks. Sadly, he moves his hand toward the figure again, with hopeful intentions. This time, the figure slides its hand into his. He brings the figure to his room and shows it to the bed. The figure lies on it eccentrically; and words pass through its lips as its head meets the pillow. “Thank you.”
Let me know if you find it interesting or even good, thanks!!!
Please remember that I NEED your opinion, I CRAVE it!!! Please, answer truthfully and let me know if you would continue to read it! Thanks!

You have an interesting way with words, and initially, I grabbed onto your theme, but I feel, that something was lacking towards the latter stage….Did you have a particular direction…Was the shadow, supposed to be his friend or was it his fathers spirit that your are trying to portray, or maybe his own fabrication…….Anyway, because i felt there were so many possible avenues, you kind of lost me, but, i would love to see more from you….Let me know please !

This is supposed a preface that gets you interested in the book, but makes no sense until after you’ve read the entire book. Tell me what you think.

A scream shot out of my mouth and went through the entire house. There was a shadow of a person standing just outside my sliding glass door. I screamed again as it tapped on the door. I heard footsteps shooting down the hall. The person’s head turned slightly like it heard the footsteps too. My hallway door shot open. I looked over and saw my family gathered in my doorway. I looked back at my sliding door. The person was gone. Was I crazy? I know I saw a person there. There was a person standing just outside my door. I heard him tap on the glass. I couldn’t be crazy. Could I?

I explained everything to my family and they all get tense and a little bit fearful. Damian scouted the immediate area. The five blurs were still there, but they were closer to the house now. Aelita and Elizabeth gasped. Cornelius, Delano, and I got more worried. Who were they? This question bothered all of us deeply. We couldn’t decipher the key riddle.

After about an hour of monitoring the blurs we decided that we would go back to sleep. This time, however, we slept in pairs. I slept in Delano’s room. Aelita slept in Damian’s room.

I was on the floor with some blankets and a pillow in Delano’s room. Within a few minutes he was snoring away, fast asleep. I found it hard to get to sleep. My room was right next to his. I’m surprised I never heard his snoring before. Each snore rumbled my ears just enough to keep me awake. After about an hour of enduring this I walked to the bathroom, got a nose plug, walked back to Delano’s room, and stuck it on his nose. It ceased the rumbling at once.

I smiled and got under the blankets on the floor. This time a different thing kept me up. The fear of the person at the door. It terrified me to think about it. I closed my eyes and started counting sheep. One sheep, two sheep, three sheep…yawn…four sheep…five sheep…

CRASH! The glass door smashed into pieces and Delano and I were on our feet ready to attack. A figure walked through the now open doorway. I strained my eyes to see the people. One was a woman. The other was a man. I was sure of that. The woman had red hair I think. Maybe brown. The man had dark hair, impossible to distinguish. It was pitch black and impossible to see their faces. Suddenly they lunged at Delano and I. My brother evaded the man but the woman grabbed my shirt as I was getting out of the way. She tackled me and started tearing at my face. Before she could get a descent blow I managed to kick her off and into Delano’s wall, shaking the whole house. My family burst through the hallway door. Delano was wrestling with the man and I jumped at the woman, successfully punching her face back into the wall. My family members deduced what was happening and joined the fight. Cornelius and Elizabeth lunged at the man and Damian and Aelita came to assist me with the woman.

“Hold her!” I yelled at the two of them. Damian and Aelita each pinned one of her shoulders to the wall. I ran out the door and into my room. I crouched down and threw the box out from under my bed. I popped it open and grabbed the gun from it. The fight was still raging on as I returned to Delano’s room. But something was different. There were more of them now. Cornelius was wrestling with another man and Elizabeth was tackling a woman. Delano was still wrestling his, and Aelita and Damian were holding the woman. I aimed my gun at her and shot. The bang turned everyone’s head. All was silent. The shot had gone right through the woman’s chest. Her head wavered for a moment, and then fell. Damian and Aelita dropped her and she fell to the floor.

The three remaining intruders stared at the body, then looked at me and snarled loudly. They all lunged at me. I raised my gun and shot, not caring for aim. One of them fell to the ground. The other two were tackled by Delano and Aelita. The one I shot scrambled to his feet and ran out the broken glass door, out into the forest. The others quickly grabbed the body of the woman and fled as well.

I was out of breath, as was the rest of my family. We looked around at each other, unable to say anything. I looked around at the extensive damage to Delano’s bedroom. There was a huge dent of crumbling drywall and paint where I had kicked the lady, and a small hole in the dent where I had smashed her head. There were cracks and dents all over the room. The glass of a mirror was broken. The bed was smashed to bits. The glass door was completely obliterated.

We looked at each other again, and then stared at the forest.

Great!
It seems to go really fast though. I’m not sure whether that is good or not, or maybe it adds to the thrill of reading it.
It sounds quite good, but just one thing, never describe something as going CRASH! or BANG!
Describe the sound, it makes it far more interesting to the reader.
Happy writing

~floo

Apart from the loud snoring, followed by a period of no breathing, when he starts breathing again his whole body shakes quite violently. This is continuous throughout the night. He goes to sleep as soon as his head hits the pillow, doesn’t wake until the next morning and nothing seems to disturb him during the night (e.g. if I put the light on or get out of bed to go to the bathroom). I don’t want to suggest anything to him until I am more sure of the facts.

there is a likelihood that he has sleep apnea. my mum has it and is currently been treated for it. she used to snore heavily, sleep as soon as she lays down or sits down, talk in her sleep, sleep a lot during the day. got so bad she even started sleeping and snoring on the bus. i got really worried and started sleeping with her. after monitoring her sleeping pattern and doing some research i knew she had and insisted she saw a doctor. she was given a breathing monitor which she had to return after a while and and the doctors said she had it really bad. they said it was risky as she had seizures of breath during her sleep which is dangerous as one can have a heart attack. she is now using something that looks like an oxygen machine and she is doing so much better now. the snoring is being suppressed by the machine and she sleeps through the night and no longer during the day. if your partner is over weight it might help if he lost some weight but it is vital that he sees a doctor soon because of the risk of a heart attack. hope this helps

Ugh…I am a female…and my husband says I snore terrible. Before you ask, yes I am overweight, but I have always been overweight, and within the past year my snoring has gotten worse and worse.

I have tried: Snorenz…breathe right strips, blowing my nose really good before I go to sleep, Afrin to help clear my sinuses so I can breathe easier, moving my pillow around in different positions, so my head is in different positions. And nothing seems to improve it.

I will note that I am extremely tired, when I wake up I feel no more rested than I did before I went to sleep. I am under a great deal of stress due to finances (we could lose our house) and so forth. Could this be making it worse? The stress I mean?

Please help…any suggestions would be helpful…before my husband either leaves me or starts sleeping on the couch or in the dog house!

You should check to see if you have sleep apnea. If so there are devices that can help with the snoring and that can help you have a good nights sleep. The devices are not very attractive to wear and can be uncomfortable, but I think you should consider that secondary to your health and to your relationship with your husband. Also know that it is not uncommon for spouses to start the night off together in the same bed and for one to move to another room or couch because of the snoring.

I am 5 months pregnant with mine and my husbands 3rd baby but i can’t help but wonder what is wrong with him or our marriage for that matter. For the past couple of months our sex life is been very dry…maybe once a week and often its a quickey which is not like us at all. My hormones have been all over the place so there have been times where i havent felt like sex but i make the effort any way. He never comes to me (sexually) he is always to tired after working 12 hour days with his new job (he started it a couple of months ago) as soon as we hit the pillow hes snoring. On weekends he goes to bed in the am hours where i have been in bed for hours…… still no effort. I have spoken many times to him about this and he reasured me that its not me he is just warn out which of course i took his word for it. About aweek ago though he came home had dinner straight away then hoped in the shower to where i cought him having a toss. I was deepley offended and he thought i was "over reacting". After him knowing that i feel unattractive being pregnant and him not making any moves he does this!! Since then i have made dinner for the two of us when the kids went to bed to have "our" time and tonight i invited him into the shower when the kids went to bed. Still nothing from him! I have made the moves many time this week but from him not a budge. Is it me? Why would he turn to "mrs palmer" then his wife when our sex life needs improving? Men can i have your thoughts as i wonder if there is more to this lack of sex and making moves then meets the eye.

There have been times in my marriage also where the sex life has been a bit infrequent and I too caught my man with mrs palmer I chatted to him about it and he said the reason he did this and not approach me is realy because he is just so tired and as selfish as what it sounds it was just easier to get it over and done with in the shower, hopw this helps!

Facts About Men
1. Men like to barbecue. Men will cook if danger is involved.

2. Men who have pierced ears are better prepared for marriage. They’ve experienced pain and bought jewelry.

3. Marrying a divorced man is ecologically responsible. In a world where there are more women than men, it pays to recycle.

4. Men are very confident people. My husband is so confident that when he watches sports on television, he thinks that if he concentrates he can help his team. If the team is in trouble, he coaches the players from our living room, and if they’re really in trouble, I have to get off the phone in case they call him.

5. Men like phones with lots of buttons. It makes them feel important.

6. Men love to be the first to read the newspaper in the morning. Not being the first is upsetting to their psyches.

7. All men are afraid of eyelash curlers. I sleep with one under my pillow, instead of a gun.

8. A good place to meet a man is at the dry cleaner. These men usually have jobs and bathe.

9. All men hate to hear "We need to talk about our relationship." These seven words strike fear in the heart of even General Schwarzkopf.

10. Men are sensitive in strange ways. If a man has built a fire and the last log does not burn, he will take it personally.

11. Men have an easier time buying bathing suits. Women have two types: depressing and more depressing. Men have two types: nerdy and not nerdy.

12. Men have higher body temperatures than women. If your heating goes out in winter, I recommend sleeping next to a man. Men are like portable heaters that snore.

13. Women take clothing much more seriously than men. I’ve never seen a man walk into a party and say "Oh, my God, I’m so embarrassed; get me out of here. There’s another man wearing a black tuxedo."

14. Most men hate to shop. That’s why the men’s department is usually on the first floor of a department store, two inches from the door.

15. If a man prepares dinner for you and the salad contains three or more types of lettuce, he is serious.

16. If you’re dating a man who you think might be "Mr. Right," if he a) got older, b) got a new job, or c) visited a psychiatrist, you are in for a nasty surprise. The cocoon-to-butterfly theory only works on cocoons and butterflies.

17. No man is charming all of the time. Even Cary Grant is on record saying he wished he could be Cary Grant.

18. When four or more men get together, they talk about sports.

19. When four or more women get together, they talk about men.

20. Men are less sentimental than women. No man has ever seen the movie THE WAY WE WERE twice, voluntarily.

21. Most women are introspective: "Am I in love? Am I emotionally and creatively fulfilled?" Most men are outrospective: "Did my team win? How’s my car?"

22. If a man says, "I’ll call you," and he doesn’t, he didn’t forget… he didn’t lose your number… he didn’t die. He just didn’t want to call you.

23. Getting rid of a man without hurting his masculinity is a problem. "Get out" and "I never want to see you again" might sound like a challenge. If you want to get rid of a man, I suggest saying, "I love you… I want to marry you… I want to have your children." Sometimes they leave skid marks.

24. Men are self-confident because they grow up identifying with super-heroes. Women have bad self-images because they grow up identifying with Barbie.

25. Male menopause is a lot more fun than female menopause. With female menopause you gain weight and get hot flashes. Male menopause – you get to date young girls and drive motorcycles.

26. Men forget everything; women remember everything.

27. That’s why men need instant replays in sports. They’ve already forgotten what happened.

Good collection and how true! # 4 and # 27 are great.

1. Men like to barbecue. Men will cook if danger is involved.

2. Men who have pierced ears are better prepared for marriage. They’ve experienced pain and bought jewelry.

3. Marrying a divorced man is ecologically responsible. In a world where there are more women than men, it pays to recycle.

4. Men are very confident people. My husband is so confident that when he watches sports on television, he thinks that if he concentrates he can help his team. If the team is in trouble, he coaches the players from our living room, and if they’re really in trouble, I have to get off the phone in case they call him.

5. Men like phones with lots of buttons. It makes them feel important.

6. Men love to be the first to read the newspaper in the morning. Not being the first is upsetting to their psyches.

7. All men are afraid of eyelash curlers. I sleep with one under my pillow, instead of a gun.

8. A good place to meet a man is at the dry cleaner. These men usually have jobs and bathe.

9. All men hate to hear "We need to talk about our relationship." These seven words strike fear in the heart of even General Schwarzkopf.

10. Men are sensitive in strange ways. If a man has built a fire and the last log does not burn, he will take it personally.

11. Men have an easier time buying bathing suits. Women have two types: depressing and more depressing. Men have two types: nerdy and not nerdy.

12. Men have higher body temperatures than women. If your heating goes out in winter, I recommend sleeping next to a man. Men are like portable heaters that snore.

13. Women take clothing much more seriously than men. I’ve never seen a man walk into a party and say "Oh, my God, I’m so embarrassed; get me out of here. There’s another man wearing a black tuxedo."

14. Most men hate to shop. That’s why the men’s department is usually on the first floor of a department store, two inches from the door.

15. If a man prepares dinner for you and the salad contains three or more types of lettuce, he is serious.

16. If you’re dating a man who you think might be "Mr. Right," if he a) got older, b) got a new job, or c) visited a psychiatrist, you are in for a nasty surprise. The cocoon-to-butterfly theory only works on cocoons and butterflies.

17. No man is charming all of the time. Even Cary Grant is on record saying he wished he could be Cary Grant.

18. When four or more men get together, they talk about sports.

19. When four or more women get together, they talk about men.

20. Men are less sentimental than women. No man has ever seen the movie THE WAY WE WERE twice, voluntarily.

21. Most women are introspective: "Am I in love? Am I emotionally and creatively fulfilled?" Most men are outrospective: "Did my team win? How’s my car?"

22. If a man says, "I’ll call you," and he doesn’t, he didn’t forget… he didn’t lose your number… he didn’t die. He just didn’t want to call you.

23. Getting rid of a man without hurting his masculinity is a problem. "Get out" and "I never want to see you again" might sound like a challenge. If you want to get rid of a man, I suggest saying, "I love you… I want to marry you… I want to have your children." Sometimes they leave skid marks.

24. Men are self-confident because they grow up identifying with super-heroes. Women have bad self-images because they grow up identifying with Barbie.

25. Male menopause is a lot more fun than female menopause. With female menopause you gain weight and get hot flashes. Male menopause – you get to date young girls and drive motorcycles.

26. Men forget everything; women remember everything.

27. That’s why men need instant replays in sports. They’ve already forgotten what happened.

This man finds them pretty hilarious! I wouldn’t call them all completely true, but each one has enough truth in it to be funny.
I can particularly identify with the idea of being insulted by the last log remaining unburnt!
And yes, we are all creeped out by eyelash curlers.